91 - It's my decision

AN: Short but I wanted to get back into the habit of not having giant gaps between posts!

Nef's POV

Shit. The boys were swept by Tampa Bay. It was unexpected after they had done so well against the Rangers. When the boys got back from Florida Sasha came directly to my apartment. He crawled into bed beside me and didn't mention anything about the series. The following morning Sasha's phone rang. It was the GM of the National team. I expected this - since the Caps were out of the playoffs the Russians would be leaving in a few days to compete in the world championship. I didn't stick around to listen to the conversation. If the timeline followed last year I would have him for a few more days before he would be leaving for training. I needed to get to campus for a study group anyway.

After a quick breakfast Sasha and I went our separate ways - me to campus and he to Kettler for the end of season wrap up. This year Sasha was better handling losing in the playoffs. Last year he had been sullen and moody but this year he was sad but he hadn't shut down the way he did last year. Later that evening he showed up at my apartment to help me pack. I'd be moving out in a few months but I'd be spending the majority of my summer over seas. Spending a month and a half in Germany at Hassim Investments Company headquarters for training and spending whatever left over time there was in Russia with Sasha wouldn't leave a lot of time to pack. I had RuTV on the television for background noise while Sasha and I packed nonessential items.

An interview with Coach Bykov came on.

"I am not inviting Alexander Semin to play. He was not very good in the games against Tampa."

Huh? Didn't Sasha get a call from the GM this morning?

"Sasha! Can you come here for a second?" I called to him. He was in my room packing the books on my bookshelf.

"Yes?" he said.

"Didn't you get a call from the GM of the National Team this morning?"

"Yeah."

I pointed to the television. "Then why is Coach Bykov saying that he didn't invite you to play?"

"I tell them no."

"What?! Why?" Hockey is his job. Why would he not go to play?

"The days not work. I be away when you graduate. Not have time to come back here for it."

"So?" I said. I had already thought of that when the tournament dates were released last month. I had also looked at what round of the playoffs my graduation would fall on in the vent that the Caps were still playing.

"You more important. I want be here for your graduation. I guess Coach Bykov not like my answer."

My first thought was how sweet it was for him to choose to be here with me rather than going back to Russia to play. My second thought was no, that's not what he's supposed to do. My third thought was that Coach Bykov was a douche.  I told him to call the GM and tell him that he would be there but of course he refused.

"No, it my decision."

"But - "

"No. I love you so I be here for you. This important."

He went back to my room, letting me know that this was the end of conversation.

I never wanted to interfere with Sasha's career. I didn't ever want him to feel like he had to choose between hockey and me. I picked up the phone and called his parents.

"Hello? Tatiana? It's Nefertiti. I'm calling about Sasha...he just told me that he turned down the National team."

"He told us  that. He wouldn't be able to attend your graduation if he went. He wants to be here for you," she told me.

"I understand that but I don't want to interfere with his career."

"Nefertiti, you're not," she insisted. "He made the decision that was best for him and the relationship he's building with you."

I could tell from the conversation that I wasn't going to be able to convince her to try and talk Sasha into going.

"I feel like he thinks he has to choose between hockey and me. I understand that he has to make sacrifices for his career and I'm okay with it I don't want him to do something that could hurt his career. I don't think he made the right decision but I don't know how to make him see that."

"I'm sorry you feel that way but there isn't anything I can do to change his mind. Besides, weren't you and Valeri telling me how I need to step back and let Sasha manage his own life? Let him make the decisions that make him happy?"  she asked me.

Yes, I'd said that. We all had and here I was going against the very thing that we had fought for.

"Yeah, you're right...I just...no, you're absolutely right."

This was Sasha's decision. It was his career and his life and he had to make the decisions that he could be happy with. I said goodbye to Tatiana and went back to packing. I'm happy that he won't be leaving soon. Last summer had been brutal and I missed him a lot.

Sasha came back into the living room.

"Did you call my mother to get her to try and change my mind?"

"Yeah, we talked for a bit."

"It's my decision and I want to be here for you. I know that there will be times in the future when I won't be able to be here for you. I want to be here to support you whenever I can." His voice was gentle and imploring, like he wanted me to understand his reasoning.

"I understand. Your mother and I talked about it. You're right and I just need to accept your decision and trust that you know what's best for you and your career."

"What?!" he said smiling. "Say that again."

"I just need to accept your decision and trust that you know what's best for you and your career."

"No, the other part where you said I was right."

"I said that? I don't remember," I said pretending that I didn't recall admitting he was right.

He grabbed my arms and pulled me into his lap.

"Say it!"  he said wrapping his arms around me, squeezing me slightly.

When I didn't answer he started to tickle me.

"Okay!" I screeched. "You're right!"

His lips found mine and he kissed me gently telling me that he loved me.