Chapter 47 – Talk or Sex? Choose wisely.

Sasha’s POV


As soon as I shut the hotel door behind us I picked Nef up and tossed her on the bed. I needed to kiss her, to hold her, to be with her, and to be inside her. We didn’t take the time to undress. I pulled her panties from under her dress after I pushed it up to her waist. She unzipped my shorts and pulled my erection from my briefs.

Hard, fast, and now seemed to be the theme of it. When I pulled out of her she winced.

“Sorry. I not mean to hurt you.”

“It’s fine.”

After discarding the condom we crawled onto the bed and held each other. This was what I had missed. They two of us together, just being near her. I knew that there was still a lot that we needed to talk about but for right now I just wanted to enjoy us.

“I missed you,” she told me.

We lay together with her head resting on my chest and my arms wrapped tightly around her. This was right. This was how it was supposed to be.

“I love you,” I whispered in her ear. “I love you so much.”

I felt her lips move against my neck. “I love you too.”

We dozed for a bit, falling in and out of sleep. We made love, needing that physical closeness that told us that we were still together, that we still belonged to each other.

“We do need to actually get out of bed,” she said.

“How I get out of bed? You hold me here.” She was straddling me.

We weren’t doing anything, just talking. We had been laying side by side but I pulled her on top of me. She started out laying flush against me but soon moved to a sitting position when I kept kissing her face.

“It’s hard to think when you do that,” she said. I had roped her into to finishing the conversation we’d started on the phone about us, my mom, and Nadiya.

We didn’t get very far before we started having sex again. Okay so laying together on a bed isn’t the best way to have a serious heart to heart. We tried sitting at the table and that didn’t work. We had sex on the table. We tried sitting on the couch and that didn’t work. We had sex on the couch, and then against the wall, and in the shower, and well you get the picture. When it seemed like we were both physically exhausted we tried to have the talk again and end up falling asleep half way through it.

When we woke up a few hours later it was close to sun down and we went to grab dinner and talk. We'd taken most of our meals in our hotel room as it was Ramadan and Muslims fasted during the day. Nef told me that it was important to respect them and refrain from eating and drinking in front of them. We also decided that it would be best if we went out to try and have this talk. It was highly unlikely that we would have sex in a public place. Neither one of us are exhibitionists and we didn't want to get arrested. After looking around the market place we settled at a café where we could talk with relative ease.

”Okay Nef, for right now I just want you to listen,” I began. ”I understand what happened and why you reacted the way you did. I know that it has been less than easy dealing with my mother and her constant negativity and for that I apologize. I’ve never given you a reason to doubt me and our relationship. I apologize for not walking away from Nadiya after the first and second time she tried something. It was my fault for putting myself in the situation in the first place. ”

”Thank you for apologizing. I have to say that I’m sorry as well. I assumed the worst, even if the situation may have warranted it. I should have spoken to you directly that night.”

”Have you always thought that I would cheat on you?” I asked her. I hoped her answer would be no.

”No, I trust you. I guess that’s why I reacted the way that I did. It was like my trust was misplaced. I thought that I should have seen it coming…maybe that I did see it coming.”

”What do you mean?”

”The reason I was so hesitant to go out with you, as anything more than friends, was because I thought that you would be that stereotypical pro athlete. You know the kind that will screw anything that has a vagina and a pulse. But then that wasn’t the case. You’re sweet and kind and caring and loving and all the things that a girl could want. When you kept hanging out with Nadiya after she tried to get with you time and time again I thought that maybe you did want her. I thought that maybe there was something there.”

”Why didn’t you tell me?” Nef had never talked to me about her insecurities. She always seemed so self-confident, so sure of herself and of us. I hadn’t considered how the repeated attempts by Nadiya and my attempts to salvage my friendship with her had affected Nef. I hadn’t given it a second thought and I know now that I should have.

”I didn’t know how to say it without sounding like a jealous psycho,” she said. ”I was worried that you would think I was controlling.”

When you’re in a relationship your actions – however small or minute they might seem – affect not only you but the person you’re in the relationship with and the relationship itself. I apologized for my oversight and she apologized for hers. We’d both made mistakes but we learned from them and we would have a stronger relationship.